


Aaahrg You Lonesome Tonight?

by ermengarde



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), GlamRPF
Genre: Gen, Pirates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-02
Updated: 2010-10-02
Packaged: 2017-10-12 09:00:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/123185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ermengarde/pseuds/ermengarde
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This was almost as bad as the time that Adam decided that he was Han Solo and Neil ended up falling off of a chair and spraining his ankle because <em>"Chewie's tall"</em>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Aaahrg You Lonesome Tonight?

**Author's Note:**

> Apologies for the terrible punnery in the title. This is, as it often is, entirely Sorchasilver's fault.

This was almost as bad as the time that Adam decided that he was Han Solo and Neil ended up falling off of a chair and spraining his ankle because _"Chewie's tall"_.

Actually, no, strike that, this was worse, because at least they were kids then and no one else had seen them and Adam had had to explain why Neil was lying on the floor, wrapped in a carpet screaming, to mom. There had been ice cream afterward and Adam had gotten into a really satisfying amount of trouble for it.

It was unlikely that there'd be any ice cream in his immediate future now (fucking fro-yo) and shit never stuck to Adam long enough for him to get into any appreciable quantity of trouble any more.

"Why do I have to be the one with the wooden leg, Adam?"

"Because I've got the eye patch and Monte's not here."

"What? What's Monte got to do with anything?"

"Well, obviously he'd be first choice for the one-legged pirate, but he's in L.A.. You're next down the list after me."

"List? What?" Neil grabbed Adam's arm to stop him reaching into his bag. He didn't want to get embroiled in another round of Adam-logic "No, look, I don't even want to know. You're crazy, all this excessive rock star lifestyle has gone to your head and you've turned into a crazy person."

"You've been saying I'm crazy since you were six."

"Crazy-er." Neil glared. "Look, going out on a boat, that sounds like it could be fun and the paps'll never get to us out there, and I know there was no way on earth you were ever going to be able to pass up the opportunity to sail on a pirate ship, but seriously, costumes? Like you don't get enough chance to dress up in your real life?"

"Fine, forget the strap on leg." Adam pouted at him and held out a bag with something red and stripy in it. "You can be the cabin boy; I guess Tay's agile enough to be the monkey."

" _You cannot make Taylor be a monkey!_ "

Adam cocked his head to one side like he was actually curious. "Why not? He's been excited about climbing all the ropes and stuff since last night."

"Rigging, it's called rigging. And you just can't – you're a grown up, you're not supposed to make your friends dress up in ridiculous clothes just so you can play with them."

Adam shook his head. "Oh Neil, no wonder you're single..."

" _Not everything's about fucking sex, Adam._ "

"Not with you, sure." Adam grinned and headed out of the room "come on, everyone's waiting for their costumes."

"I hate you."

"I hate you, _sir_. I'm the captain, you're the boy." Adam stopped and turned on his heel. "Mmh. Yeah, I'll need that costume back from you, later."

"Shut up! You know, there's such a thing as too much information Adam."

Adam reached over and patted him on the head. "Poor little Neil."

"Ass."

Adam struck a pose. "Isn't it awesome?"

"No."

"I'm wounded."

Neil grinned. "It's way too hairy for my tastes."

"Bitch! I do not have a hairy ass."

"Only because you wax it."

"I don't..." Adam narrowed his eyes. "Just because you've got something against making the best of yourself."

"I like sleeping more than _primping_ , it's not exactly a crime."

"Nope, but it is why I'm the captain and you're the cabin boy..."

"I doubt pirates chose their leaders because they were _fabulous_."

"Did Johnny Depp teach you nothing?"

Neil threw up his hands, "fine, _sir_ , but I'm not going on this ridiculous adventure unless there's ice cream."

"We've got fro.."

"No! None of your fat free crap. I want real, honest-to-god, nine billion calorie, ice cream."

"You'll need to call the boat people..."

"No problem, I'll have _hours_ while you're getting ready."

  


The ship was kind of awesome, all done out like a real pirate ship but surprisingly comfortable, and everyone looked just as fucking ridiculous as Neil (except for Adam, but Neil was never going to admit that outside of his own head) so maybe it wasn't all terrible. A stripy shirt and cut offs weren't as bad as a carpet and it was unlikely that he'd end up in bandages and sure, Taylor was positively gleeful over his stupid monkey costume and Adam wasn't getting in any trouble at all for this, but meh, he had ice cream and now he was old enough to mix it with _tequila_.


End file.
